Childhood Best Friends Overcome Infertility to Meet Their Baby Girl | Tulsa Cesarean Birth Story of Clara Eloise
I’ll never forget walking into Starbucks the first time I got to meet the C family. They were sitting at the table, sipping on their drinks with this childlike excitement that reminded me of the Sunday night trips to Starbucks I used to take with my friends in high school. They just exuded JOY in this journey they were on… and the obvious affection for each other along with the little bit of nervous energy as we chatted through their birth plan demonstrated how excited and ready they were for this next step as a family. As I got to know them better… I learned about the looooong journey that led them to their baby girl, and fell even more in love with them and their story. I am SO honored to get to share it with you today, through the words of Mrs. C herself! <3
I have always wanted to be a mom. I truly believe it is a God given desire that was placed in my heart many years ago. It wasn’t until I was 16 that I realized that sometimes, despite how much we long for something, God’s answer can be no. It was a foundation shaking realization. Over the next 10+ years it was something I intermittently struggled over. A secret fear that I would stuff away since it didn’t apply to my life at the time. Maybe God would say no to my dream.
My husband, Tyler, and I have known each other all our lives. Our first picture together is him as a toddler holding me as a newborn. I grew up dreaming about how romantic it would be if we were meant to be together. Over the years, we developed a strong friendship that neither of us wanted to risk - not knowing that we each had a crush on each other. We even went to prom together as “just friends”. That friendship continued until, suddenly in 2014, we both realized it was more. It was love. So after dating for three months, we were engaged for five, and married in May of 2015.
Each in our late 20s, we started trying to conceive at the beginning of 2016. Enter that fear I’d been stuffing all my life. I was horrified as my fear turned into reality. In October, we were diagnosed with both female and male factor infertility. We started looking into our options- discussing fertility treatments and adoption. All the while, we prayed and prayed. Prayed for guidance, prayed for a miracle, mostly prayed for peace. I could go much more in depth into that time, but God did answer our prayers. We found a fertility clinic in Missouri called Missouri Center for Reproductive Medicine, or MCRM Fertility. Each small step we took, we felt God’s peace and guidance. By August of 2017, we had gone through two egg retrievals and were blessed with four viable embryos. We transferred our first on October 17, 2017, and 41 weeks and 2 days later, on July 11, 2018, we welcomed our miracle baby into the world.
Carrying Clara was a joy I cherished every day. I realized how much I would have taken for granted had we not struggled so hard for her. She made every shot, blood draw, fertility procedure, and finally all the discomforts of pregnancy absolutely worth it. My ideal birth was going to be guided by her. I didn’t want to be induced, I was even flirting with trying to deliver without an epidural. We ended up being admitted on my due date due to my hypertension and swelling. They also were concerned about her, so we reluctantly agreed to be induced. Twenty four hours later, Clara and I were both responding negatively to the Pitocin, and I hadn’t made any kind of progress. After turning off the medicine and both of our vital signs stabilizing, we went home and I was basically on bed rest for a week. After a lot of prayer and talking with our doctor, we decided to schedule a C-Section.
The morning of July 11th, I went into labor. By the time we got to the hospital, I was contracting every two and a half minutes. However, it turned out I was still not dilated at all. When they put on the monitor, we also discovered Clara’s heart rate was dropping to the mid 50s with my contractions. Suddenly there was a flurry of activity. I was put on oxygen and repositioned to my side. IVs were started and the doctor was called immediately. They explained to us that she was in distress and needed to be delivered as soon as possible. Thankfully we were in the hands of wonderful nurses and doctors. Clara was delivered safely at 7:42 am, although a little more dramatically than we had anticipated.
I was unprepared for the reality of my C-section. No one warned me the epidural would make me shake terribly or that I would feel so nauseated. They didn’t bring my husband back at first, so I felt scared and isolated all the while being thankful they were working diligently to deliver her. And then she was finally here! Tyler bringing our daughter over to meet me was the most amazing moment of my life. It still brings tears to my eyes. Watching him as a father has been the greatest delight and made me fall more in love with him. We have spent everyday since marveling at this miracle we have been blessed with. The love I feel for her has shown me that God has always been in control and loves us with the same, but even deeper love.
I am thankful for my experience with infertility. Yes it has been hard, scary, and emotionally exhausting, but it has also brought so much joy and love into my life. My eyes have been opened to so many others’ experiences. My husband and I have built a strong foundation of faith to build our marriage and family on, drawing us closer to each other and to the Lord. I had to learn to lean on others for support. We were lead to MCRM, Dr. Ahlering, and his fantastic staff. Also to Dr. Nilson at Tulsa Women’s Healthcare, who helped us laugh our way through all the awkwardness and discomfort that comes with fertility and pregnancy monitoring. And most importantly, we now have our precious daughter, Clara Eloise. He took my fear and turned it into unspeakable joy. Our hearts are so full!
Jeremiah 29:11 • Psalm 37: 4-5 • Proverbs 19:21 • Proverbs 3:5 • Romans 15:13 • 1 Samuel 1:27 • Psalms 23